Collision shortage opens 401 for brief period

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Due to an extreme weather deficiency causing no collisions over the last 24 hours, Highway 401 was open for an extended period today through the entire Belleville-Kingston-Brockville corridor.

“I’ve never seen anything like it,” commented a local delivery driver. “Cars in the ditch, trucks on their side… I would have expected to see at least something like that out there today. It was unbelievable.”

Local OPP are just as baffled. Media officers reported that cruisers from all areas were being tasked with responding to issues entirely uninvolved with highway traffic. Traffic redirection and Emergency Detour Routes remained unused for the majority of the day, and traffic delays were reduced to unusually low numbers even during workday commuter hours.

Although disturbing, meteorologists are confident that a large band of snow and ice should pass through the area through the weekend and return highway conditions to seasonal norms. At this time, motorists are asked to pay more attention to the road and their surroundings, and to drive to match the conditions.

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